Life Makes for Good Art - Don’t Be Afraid to Get Messy
When I say art here I am including every and any facet that involves the creative side. From creating music to making custom shoe laces, it all counts. It’s anything that we as creators make in the world that is totally and completely original. And of course we take from what is already here to a certain extent, but in our recreation it becomes original. As a writer I have noticed, it seems my most ardent and noteworthy pieces are entangled in this life of ‘messy’ and this brings up the idea that our ability to be vulnerable in circumstances where the outcome is unknown, taking risks that might not pan out, is divinely inspired.
Our aversion to the unknown, is a major hindrance to the magic of life. We seem to have forgotten why playing as children was so endearing. It was all about the unknown and as we traverse life circumstances and try to set ourselves up for the life we have always dreamed of, we don’t leave room for the surprises it can often bring. I recently met with a man named Marc. An older married gentleman who was speaking to me on the basis of subconscious programming. Now I won't get into the details of why I was meeting him, as it is not relevant to the focus of this piece. But what was incredible is there seemed to be magic in our meeting, a subtle knowing of a soul connection beyond what our physical bodies could express. Speaking to him felt like home. It was is if I was speaking to my grandmother and who knows maybe she was him reincarnated. The poignant part of this story is that I had an aversion to meeting him because of the reasons behind the meeting. I was suspect of his intentions lets say, and what transpired was a beautiful nd yet subtle connection that might possibly morph into a long standin friendship. So when do know we can start to be vulnerable enough to let the magic happen in these situations?
As a person learning the difference in true vulnerability and sharing or what some may call oversharing (I’m still grappling with this issue obviously), I found this a good read. What’s oversharing vs being truly vulnerable? I have narrowed it down to intention… True vulnerability is saying something in an intentional way, that shares a part of you that might not be accepted by others and leaning into it. Over sharing is disembodied, with no intention. It seems it’s more of a way to prove that you are worthy of having a connection. People who know their worth will share with more intention and more courage, not letting their walls come up, when sharing personal information. I have summed this up from the wise words of Brene Brown
I believe we have become so complacent in reaching for a life that could encompass the unknown we have inadvertently created a life of polarization and apathetic living. I believe it's often why in midlife, these crises happen. Because life slaps you in the face with a realization…
“We all grew up, and experienced at varying degrees trauma, disappointment, hell. Hard stuff, we armored up, and at some point that armor no longer serves us. The weight of the armor is too heavy. And it's not protecting you, It’s keeping you from being seen and known by others. This is the developmental milestone of midlife. This is when the universe comes down, puts her hands on your shoulders and pulls you close and whispers in your ear, I’m not fucking around. You're halfway to dead. The armor is keeping you from growing into the gifts that I've given you. That is not without penalty. Your time is up. So this is what you see happen to people in midlife. And it's not a crisis, it's a slow brutal unraveling. This is where everything we thought protected us, keeps us from being the partners, the parents, the professionals, and the people that we want to be.” - Brene Brown.
Not only does it matter how much we share in life, and the perimeters in which we share, it matters that creating a sense of normalcy, surrounding the unknown is cherished. I don’t think you can get to the really vulnerable stuff without getting to this facet first. Emotional resilience lies in this comfortability of circumstances unknown. A good friend speaking on the narrative of the Dukkha, would state it as the impermanence of life, and the acceptance of that impermanence and the acceptance of a loss that could be made worse through rumination. We see this as so detrimental but what we fail to realize as full fledged adults is that this is also where the magic lies. The unknown is what keeps us striving for more, so in training ourselves to let go of outcomes, we get to experience the joy of life in real time. We feel strongly in the face of letting go of an idealized life, and its not just the rumination that makes it hard its just that it is hard to let go, it is the idea I believe that we are trying in life to mute what we feel, but in all of our feelings we create magic and in all of the unknown and heartache we connect. I would ask the Buddhists, if it is the suffering our mind creates that is hard to handle or just a biological reaction that is innate and the suffering comes from believing these feelings should be avoided? That will be for the next blog….
If we are armored up, often times, the creative won’t come out to play. We won’t be divinely inspired by the provocation of what our emotions can emulate through us. In order to break down the armour, a slow fading of beliefs is often necessary, a time of focused rest where our subconscious can come forward and lend us a hand in knowing what those beliefs are. In the groups I facilitate, we practice these intentional mindful techniques and if you are interested in learning more please reach out.
sgreenwd22@gmail.com
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